I remember the first time I was told that "Christmas" is a "mass for Christ," which is actually a celebration of death. I was shocked and I didn't believe it. A mass, as in death mass, is obviously m-a-s-s, while the suffix "mas" on the end of a word means "of or about" something...in this case Christ. So, there ya go...Christmas is the day of and about Christ.
But now, I think there are a few problems with this. Apparently, the date of the birth of Jesus, was never actually recorded, but it is believed to've been in the spring time, because in the Biblical story there are shepherds abiding in the field keeping watch over their flocks. I don't believe this would have happened in the winter. Secondly, how could they have stayed in a stable all night in the winter? It's not like they had the
wooly coat of a sheep! Especially a newborn baby...he probably would've frozen! I've heard that for wealthy folks at that time, their stables where their animals were was actually on a lower level of the house itself. In other words, I 'd doubt that the trio was out in a barn, in an empty field, several hundred yards from the residence. That being said, who decided to celebrate the day (or night) of his birth on December 25? Secondly, the Hebrew calendar does not work the same way as ours does. I BELIEVE our month of July came from Julius Caesar (??) and August is named for St. Augustine.
Before then, there were ten months and the prefixes for the last four made sense... September (Seven), October (eight), November (nine), and December (ten). There is no. "J" sound in the Hebrew language, so where did we get "Jesus" from? Apparently, it's Greek? Yes? Now there's not a thing wrong with anything Greek, but why was his name changed? Why has the season of his birth been changed so drastically?...
If I am sure of anything in my life, it is that Yeshuah (Jesus) has "come into my heart" as we say...and changed me from the inside. Yes, I said the sinner's prayer,and asked him into my heart & he answered. As I've said before on this blog... This is where it can be difficult...because I cannot take my (changed) heart out of my chest and say "see?"
I have said some very strong things on this blog. Some of the things that I pontificate about here...I know little about. I'm trying to gain a better understanding, and truthfully, the more I want to know, sometimes the more I just feel like crying. When a person becomes a Christian, we talk excitedly about how we have been renewed. The old things are passed away, all things are made new. It's as though a fire is glowing inside that was not there before. We then gain wisdom gradually through walking with our savior everyday, and as we stay close to him, we mature, and become seasoned as believers.
But, when I began learning about the Messianic Movement and Messianic Roots, it was as though all the growing and seasoning and maturing I'd done previous to that was "burned up" if you will, because a different, much stronger fire was suddenly ablaze inside. Suddenly, I was "on fire" again...which is wonderful! But at the same time, my slate had been wiped clean. I was back at square one, starting all over again, and felt sort of like a baby learning to walk (for the 3'd time). This time, was not like when I was a fifteen year old kid & I'd found Jesus for the first time. This time, suddenly, I began to realize that in fact, I had not really KNOWN this Jesus that I had "asked into my heart" about 21 years previous. This is humbling but also a bit embarrassing and sad to me...even frightening at times. There have been moments when I've thought "What in the world is happening to me?". But as Maya Angelou said: "When you know better, you do better."
Anyway, the problems I pointed out at the beginning, are I believe evidence of growth. Pre Messianic Movement, I never would have felt the need to even ask such questions. Anyway, it has become abundantly clear to me that I've known nothing about Jewish life or Jewish culture. I also knew hardly anything about the Torah, or the Tanach. These things are all important because I've claimed to worship and follow the GOD of the Hebrews, correct? The short version is that I got about 90% of my scripture out of the New Testament, or Br't Hadasha, and Knew how to witness to others using the New Testament. I did not even think that the Old Testament mentioned Yeshuah (Jesus) at all, because he had not been born yet. I was so busy being so glad that God had come and met ME where I was, that I was not really LEARNING how it is that HE want's to be worshipped.
I remember when I started learning the Shema. It was as if I could feel myself getting closer to Jesus each time. I was so excited when I made my first Rosh Hashanah cupcakes. To me, that was my way of celebrating one of G-d the Father's " feast days" the way it was supposed to be celebrated. Not perfect, by any means, but just one purposeful step in a direction I believed G-d wanted me to go. I was so busy thinking of Jesus as a divine "buddy" who went with me wherever I went, that I rarely thought about reverencing my Father in Heaven, covering my head, or purposely showing any respect to him.
I've written on this blog many times about the fascination and the endearment Christians can develop with the Jewish people, and also with anything Israel. We often can become obsessed with this things, because in the Tanach, Adonai says "I will bless those who bLess you & curse those who curse you, concerning Israel. Then there is the fact that our savior was born in Betlehem and Israel is where he walked & talked, it's where the Mount of Olives is, and Where he cried out to his Father concercing the cross he was to bear, asking that His will be done...but if possible, could this "cup" pass from him.". So, imagine our surprise, when we dream of making a pilgrimage to Israel...maybe we discover the Messianic Movement or Messianic Roots, and then we learn a lot more...
I did not know that many people in Israel (in particular), think that "missionary" is a dirty word. They are not interested in hearing anything about Jesus, and don't want Christians telling them that Jesus was Jewish too, as though this is the greatest blessing ever. The Old Testament is considered to be the Hebrew Bible, and the New Testament is in most cases, considered strictly for Christians. Many Jewish folks won't read it. My heart dropped to the floor when I found this out...because I had to realize that no matter how much I might want to share with someone about Jesus, it probably would do me no good. Personally, where did I go from there...I had no idea. So, let me see if I have this right: In Judaism there is no Trinity and there is no Original sin. Jesus Christ, or Yeshua is not the Messiah, and so I've heard (some say) that his genealogy is made up ?? I can show someone where Jesus is talked about in the Old Testament, and they will probably tell me that it is not Jesus being talked about there...is thar right? But those who are Jewish are blessed as God's chosen people, right? So they are supposed to be even closer to him than we (Gentiles) are right?
But, if one does not believe that Yeshuah is G-d...then this changes EVERYTHING. I see. I get it. But as a Believer in Yeshuah as the Messiah, this is an ironic, and seemingly dismal reality. What do I do now?? I have all these dreams about going to Israel to see where my savior lived his life and carried out his ministry...only to find that in the places where he actually lived...it is largely believed that he is NOT the savior. The whole Messianic Movement is a puzzlement, and as far as I know, quite offensive. So the irony of my life has now become that if I want to stay as close as possible to my savior, it might do me better to stay home, thousands of miles away. This makes me very sad. Now, this is certainly not to say that I can't visit Israel...of course I can...but I've certainly had a rude awakening, as far as what to expect.
So, I then began puzzling and puzzling over why it is that Christians and those who are Jewish are continually divided and considered separate from each other. Why can't a Christian be Jewish? Why can't someone who's Jewish be accepting of Yeshuah...without being considered a traitor or something? So, this is NOT about putting anyone down or saying that anyone is any better than anyone else. I'm saying that after doing a 180, and realizing that I was not really cultivating a relationship with my savior...which is all I ever talked about, I was able to become a lot closer to him...only to be introduced to what is probably the biggest irony I've run into so far. I'm absolutely certain that Jesus is Lord & he rules in my life...but I do not get it now, even more than I didn't get it before. Go figure. No one can have all the answers & I can't either. Everyone has the right to think and feel what they want. All of this just leaves me with a heavy heart. I love Israel because I love Jesus...do you see what I mean?
Sometimes, when you have a heavy heart about something, you just have to get it out...but the writings in this blog are not meant to make anyone feel less than...it's more to help me vent. But if anyone ever has felt picked on, insulted or less than as they've read this...my profound apologies.
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